elilla, quarantined on Nostr: from recent conversations: "it's not that people broke up with me exactly during my ...
from recent conversations:
"it's not that people broke up with me exactly during my down phase, it's just... BDSM isn't just a way to get off, it's also like, a hobby? and once I couldn't offer domming it turns out I had very little else in common with most of my partners. the average girl I dated spent her time with like, programming, DIY electronics, synthetisers and... trains. while my main interests are wild gardening, poetry, historical linguistics and punching nazis. we found ourselves with little to talk about or, like, *do*, when they visited me. so people just drifted away."
"being able to be sexual again therefore meant a dramatic increase in how often I get an opportunity to socialise with new people, how many people I interact with in a month, and that more than anything is a big mental health improvement for me. but going forward I want to diversify more, to find people near me who are into W.H. Auden or soil microbiology or sign languages etc. I enjoy being openly sexual but I don't want to be defined by that only. am large, multitudes, et cetera."
"not that this is new, but it's much harder for me than finding sexual partners. trying to meet people with common interests in the trans-queer scene and in the Left bubble didn't work out so well, so I guess that means opening up to have more cis or liberal friends, in the year 2025 of all times"
"it's not that people broke up with me exactly during my down phase, it's just... BDSM isn't just a way to get off, it's also like, a hobby? and once I couldn't offer domming it turns out I had very little else in common with most of my partners. the average girl I dated spent her time with like, programming, DIY electronics, synthetisers and... trains. while my main interests are wild gardening, poetry, historical linguistics and punching nazis. we found ourselves with little to talk about or, like, *do*, when they visited me. so people just drifted away."
"being able to be sexual again therefore meant a dramatic increase in how often I get an opportunity to socialise with new people, how many people I interact with in a month, and that more than anything is a big mental health improvement for me. but going forward I want to diversify more, to find people near me who are into W.H. Auden or soil microbiology or sign languages etc. I enjoy being openly sexual but I don't want to be defined by that only. am large, multitudes, et cetera."
"not that this is new, but it's much harder for me than finding sexual partners. trying to meet people with common interests in the trans-queer scene and in the Left bubble didn't work out so well, so I guess that means opening up to have more cis or liberal friends, in the year 2025 of all times"