𓅓 𝚖𝚘𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝚘𝚠𝚕. on Nostr: lyrics ( this took me an hour): Melvin, Melvin, brother of the Joker! Melvin, Melvin, ...

lyrics (
this took me an hour):
Melvin, Melvin, brother of the Joker!
Melvin, Melvin, brother of the Joker!
Melvin, Melvin, brother of the Joker!
I’m cool!
Hello! Hi, I am Melvin, the brother of the Joker! I'm sure a lot of you haven't heard of me...but, I am the brother of, yes the infamous Joker, y'know, 'why so serious' y’know, all that stuff...uh, actually I too have been working on my own catchphrase, um...Sploopity Sploosh! May not be as catchy, but uh I-I think it works. So, yeah! Alright uhh first of all I'd like to welcome all the newcomers to my blog, hello! Uh, hopefully we're going to talk a lot about evil! Lots of nasty evil evil! ...did I repeat myself- I guess it doesn't matter, umm, y'know cause evil does repeat itself, it's all about getting that massive....I dont know where I'm going with that. Anyway, okay, so uhh today's secret subject- or not secret it’s not- I mean this is all secret don’t tell anybody but, y’know today’s uh - big I should say, big subject is...Rayguns! Now, the th…. The thing about rayguns is that they are very very expensive as I found out! So-
Mmmeeeelllvviiiiinnnn!
...So what you’re gonna wanna do, if you wanna get a raygun-
Mmmmeellllvviiiiiinnnn!!!!!
There-there’s uh, all sorts of rayguns that you can get! There’s um-
Mmmmellllvvvviiiinnn what are you doing?!
There’s uh- laser! Uh, there’s uh solar, There’s uh-
Mmmeellllviiiiinnnn I want some hot chocolate.
There’s uh, ones that fire bullets I guess that would just be a gun! There’s uh-
Mmmelllllviiinnnnnn! Meeeellllllvviiiinnn!!!
Little busy right now! Uh, there’s the ones that um, shoot raisins I haven’t seen that as much, uh, but they do exist I saw it on eBay! (Meeellvvviiiinnnnn!! Meeeelllllvvvviiiiin! Mmmeeeellllllvvviiiiiin! MelvIIIiiiiIIIIiiiIIIIiiiiIIIIiiiIIIIiiiiiIIIiiiinnn!)
WHAT?!
I’m thirsty, make me some hot chocolate!
No, I’m busy!
Busy doing what!
I’m busy- that’s my um, uhh secretary, she is uh...very, very evil indeed!
Mmmeellvviiin why haven’t you taken out the garbage yet!
MOOOMM, PLEEEEASSEE DON’T ANNOY ME!!!
Well then keep it down, Melvin!
NO, I HAVE TO DO THIS MOM I-
Keep it down, I’m trying to watch Glumbomerry Smetlock!
I will try to keep it down, mother. Okay?
Whaaat? I didn’t hear you.
I SAID I WILL TRY TO KEEP IT DOWN-
OWWWW YOU’RE HURTING MY EAARS MELVIN, YOU’RE HURTING MY EEAARS!
So anyway!
Such a failure!
MOM!!!
Why can’t you stop, I want my hot chocolate!
I WILL NOT STOP, I NEED TO DO THIS MOM, I HAVE PEOPLE WATCHING!
Oh wait, I had some hot chocolate the whole time!
Where was I…?
Isn’t that funny, Melvin?
Oh, uh, r-r-r-rayguns! Yes, rayguns! Um, now, I have someone who is actually working on a raygun as we speak! ...And no it is not my mother…. I should probably address that! Uh, I do in fact live with my mother, I’m not ashamed to say that, uhh I just take a little longer to get going...uh, as opposed to other people. Uh, I see no shame in it...even though she constantly does. So, uh, basically what I would li-
MEELLVIIN IT’S TOO HOT!
[cut]
Okay! I just slipped her about 50 vicodin so I think we’re good! Ahem, now one of the thi-
MMEELLVIIN WHY IS THE ROOM SPINNING!
My god, she’s like an ox!
[cut]
Okay, I just uh slipped a whole packet of nyquil into her milk, she’s gonna take a little nap now. Uh, so yeah, rayguns! Uh, I see a lot of villains using them, but um...let’s be honest, people. You don’t need them! Uh, what is it that a laser gun can do that a normal gun...can’t do! ...Destroy cities, sure, but if you get a gun that’s big enough...it could do that! I-I don’t know where you’d buy the bullets but I’m sure they’re out there! I’m sure they are out there - massive, massive bullets.... Okay maybe a raygun would be a very very good thing to get, I don’t know, uh...but, uh, I do not have the money for some, uh I’ve been debating whether or not how to uh, I’ve been uh, uh, thinking-thinking how to get uh, some-some-some bullets, uh, not bullets- god my mind I just can’t….
[Sighs]
I’m sorry I just uh...I’ve just been under a lot of stress, you know, I uh...I still...haven’t gotten a job...y’know, uh…. What am I talking about, evil is my job! Yes, cause I am Melvin! The brother of the Joker! I-I-
MEELLVIIIINNNN, MMELLVIIIIINNNNNN, MMMMMELLLLLVIIIIINNNNN!!!!! (She woke up, my god, how did she wake up? )
I’ll be in a minute, mom! So um, yeah, uh rayguns I don’t see the necessity of them!
Such a failure!