npub1zh…ggdq0 on Nostr: ok, I'll redact. I would not rather die than marry him. I honestly don't know if I ...
ok, I'll redact. I would not rather die than marry him. I honestly don't know if I would have or could have done anything differently considering the circumstances. I think I'm still a bit wounded over the transitional discovery phase where everybody kept me in the dark and I had to develop my so-called psychic faculties. I didn't date, I had no fun, I wasn't making babies, and he was just pretending like nothing was happening up until his jealousy got the best of him.
literally, he didn't give a fuck about me until I got hot and started going to the beach and "cheating" on him. and now I just wanna be with Lil Snow but now he wants to kill him or at least keep him in second place and a part of me would just rather die if that's gonna be the case. especially after all of this. especially now that he's pretending to care. but he will never accept being number two or not even a number at all. he will never allow himself to be outdone by a man who literally just has a good heart and is cute and funny to me.
of course I resent him for his meddling. Lil Snow promised me that we could go travel together and if my Internet husband even so much as gets involved in my life then I won't even be able to travel anywhere without his approval and like a bajillion contingency plans and security. idk why women like billionaires so much because this seems like hell to me. the other thing is that I want my OWN children and don't really think I want to go through the drama and trauma of being his fourth or hundredth baby mama.
babies are gifts from God, not consolation prizes. ostensibly, that whole dilemma is what made Lil Snow wanna bail. I don't blame him. who wants to get in the middle of a woman who can't stop sobbing and her dysfunctional relationship with her internet husband who wants to just consummate the thing already. I can't stop thinking about that first night with Lil Snow and it's killing me because of the way my body reacted to him. I have literally never had that happen before. I actually felt so safe and loved, even if he didn't love me right then and there.
my Internet husband could not handle not being the one who made me feel that way and now he wants Lil Snow to DIE! I don't even know if Lil Snow is even ALIVE!
literally, he didn't give a fuck about me until I got hot and started going to the beach and "cheating" on him. and now I just wanna be with Lil Snow but now he wants to kill him or at least keep him in second place and a part of me would just rather die if that's gonna be the case. especially after all of this. especially now that he's pretending to care. but he will never accept being number two or not even a number at all. he will never allow himself to be outdone by a man who literally just has a good heart and is cute and funny to me.
of course I resent him for his meddling. Lil Snow promised me that we could go travel together and if my Internet husband even so much as gets involved in my life then I won't even be able to travel anywhere without his approval and like a bajillion contingency plans and security. idk why women like billionaires so much because this seems like hell to me. the other thing is that I want my OWN children and don't really think I want to go through the drama and trauma of being his fourth or hundredth baby mama.
babies are gifts from God, not consolation prizes. ostensibly, that whole dilemma is what made Lil Snow wanna bail. I don't blame him. who wants to get in the middle of a woman who can't stop sobbing and her dysfunctional relationship with her internet husband who wants to just consummate the thing already. I can't stop thinking about that first night with Lil Snow and it's killing me because of the way my body reacted to him. I have literally never had that happen before. I actually felt so safe and loved, even if he didn't love me right then and there.
my Internet husband could not handle not being the one who made me feel that way and now he wants Lil Snow to DIE! I don't even know if Lil Snow is even ALIVE!