Thorwegian ❄️ on Nostr: the woman i was seeing the other week was profoundly feminine in her approach. female ...
the woman i was seeing the other week was profoundly feminine in her approach.
female perspective:
"women who connect will display affection and have sleepovers together, and i connect with this man in a way that i usually only do with women, so i'm going to have a sleepover with him and put on displays of affection. i'm also attracted to him, however, so there will be intimacy. i don't think any of this signals any serious intent on my part, because it's just an intimate sleepover. i'll just explain to him that now is not a good time for a relationship, and it should be fine, right?"
male perspective:
"men who connect don't usually display affection or have sleepovers together. that kind of behaviour is reserved for expressing romantic intent and is also seen in parent-child relationships. if a woman acts in that way to a man, her actions send a certain message. if her words disagree with these actions, this does not resolve the problem, but instead sends mixed messages. a woman who behaves like that but doesn't have any serious intentions is asking for trouble."
actions are a language and they speak louder than words, because actions are real-world outcomes and words are not.
she had good reason to not get involved and to not rush it, but her actions and emotions appeared to be in complete disagreement with it, and this made me angry.
she told me at one point that deep conversations and tender intimacy wasn't a combo she had encountered in a man before. i think that would explain why she found me attractive.
the purpose of the initial meet-up wasn't to have a date with romantic intent. we both agreed in retrospect that neither of us had planned it that way. she was too busy to be dating and would be leaving town soon, but did so anyway.
and she stated that she had no serious intent, but i didn't listen, because her actions said otherwise.
quite the mess, in other words.
female perspective:
"women who connect will display affection and have sleepovers together, and i connect with this man in a way that i usually only do with women, so i'm going to have a sleepover with him and put on displays of affection. i'm also attracted to him, however, so there will be intimacy. i don't think any of this signals any serious intent on my part, because it's just an intimate sleepover. i'll just explain to him that now is not a good time for a relationship, and it should be fine, right?"
male perspective:
"men who connect don't usually display affection or have sleepovers together. that kind of behaviour is reserved for expressing romantic intent and is also seen in parent-child relationships. if a woman acts in that way to a man, her actions send a certain message. if her words disagree with these actions, this does not resolve the problem, but instead sends mixed messages. a woman who behaves like that but doesn't have any serious intentions is asking for trouble."
actions are a language and they speak louder than words, because actions are real-world outcomes and words are not.
she had good reason to not get involved and to not rush it, but her actions and emotions appeared to be in complete disagreement with it, and this made me angry.
she told me at one point that deep conversations and tender intimacy wasn't a combo she had encountered in a man before. i think that would explain why she found me attractive.
the purpose of the initial meet-up wasn't to have a date with romantic intent. we both agreed in retrospect that neither of us had planned it that way. she was too busy to be dating and would be leaving town soon, but did so anyway.
and she stated that she had no serious intent, but i didn't listen, because her actions said otherwise.
quite the mess, in other words.