Creative! Queer!! Autistic!!! on Nostr: I can’t sleep because I’m still overcome with anger, mostly at myseld, because I ...

I can’t sleep because I’m still overcome with anger, mostly at myseld, because I KNEW BETTER, and I allowed guilt and sentimentality get the better of me… and then I was just proves right, over and over again.

I was stupid to comply, I was stupid to let my guard down, I hate myself for being so stupid, and I will be paying the price tomorrow. Lack of sleep and stress are rhe biggest triggers of seizures, and I am ripe for one now, with all this anger, frustration, sadness and self-loathing swirling around.

“… and that’s what Christmas means to me!”