melissa on Nostr: I'm not an expert in a super studied sense (or maybe I am and I should rate myself ...

I'm not an expert in a super studied sense (or maybe I am and I should rate myself higher), but as a parent of 4 kids ages 2-17 I kind of do know something...

Here's my take on technology and the small people. I'm not saying it's great for all kids - one of my kids devices ended up in the ocean 3 years ago - and she thanks me for that now... 🤣

But we can relax a bit. Let go of the shoulds and should nots and just follow our instincts. I'm always super proud of what my 8 yo is achieving online. Not many adults can do what he's doing. He's creating habits that are required for success. And that makes me proud. 🙌

Also, this doesn't mean every parent needs to stick their kids in front of computers if they don't want to. I do admire parents with that level of no technology dedication. I'm a technology nerd myself so I'm good with my kids on devices. I understand the risks too. 🙏🙏🙏💛💛💛

quoting note1tdu…yd4n

My kids like the internet. A lot of kids enjoy it. My kid has been coding since he was 6 and has a Youtube channel with over 100 videos. Some of his videos have thousands of plays. I'm super amazing over the moon proud of him. He enjoys it. I don't have to nag or encourage - I didn't even know he had been so consistent up until recently. I'm a proud technology loving parent. I grew up in the age of computers and internet, why would I want anything less for my children! 😍

As a family, we are pretty relaxed and run with self-led learning and unschooling while we travel the world. 🌎 I'm good with my children accessing technology and the internet. Others might not be. But as a real world parent of 4 kids aged 2-17, I know what I'm doing. I'm comfortable with my choice to allow my children to experiment with these things that are a part of life this century. 💯

The world 'should' is not a really constructive word. Because every child is unique. Every family is different. Every should is a possible shaming tool to make a parent feel like maybe they aren't doing enough or that they 'should' do it another way. What if I'm not a 'great parent' because I allow my children to buck the trend that a bunch of adults determined as a group 'should not' be the way of great parenting. 💡

My experience of 8 years home schooling and 4.5 years worldschooling says let the children do what they love. Allow them to thrive. Allow them to be successful in the things that interest them. 💻

Finally. I learn more from my children than I can ever say. 💜

As adults, sometimes we think we know more than our small people. We put all our energy into studies and evidence and blah blah blah. But the truth is, very little of all that matters. Our children know more than we do. Watch. Observe. Learn from them instead of the adult world which is often speaking from indoctrination.

Living life to the fullest, play, do what we love, having wonderful relationships, hugs, time and adventure together is our priority. 🥰

I'm passionate about this because there is no perfect parenting. No parenting style is without flaws. Far too much emphasis is put on how we micromanage parenting. It is fear based. This is because as parents, it is natural to worry that we are messing up our kids. ❤️

However, the reality is, not one parent gets it perfect. You can be the "perfect" text book parent and still your child can reach adulthood and choose a life you never imagined. Alternatively, you can be the worst parent on the planet and your child might choose a life of incredible success.

I would love to see parents everywhere to chill. Relax. Tap into intuition. Allow discovery and exploration. Allow growth in interest led learning adventures. Drop the rules (I'm a rebel so rules for me are a waste of time) 😅

If kids are interested in digital life, it isn't a bad thing. 🤷‍♀️

And if families give their children devices too young or whatever, the best we can do is learn to accept that what may not be right for us, could be ok for them. It's their journey after all. 💛💛💛

Parenting is parenting. It's not easy. It's messy. We beat ourselves up enough as it is. We definitely don't need internet conversations that can make someone feel bad about their parenting choices. 🙏

More compassion. More love. More encouragement without judgement is whats needed for millennial parents around the world. 🥰