Psyduck on Nostr: Here are your Bitcoin horoscopes #nostriches Aries (March 21 - April 19) The fires of ...
Here are your Bitcoin horoscopes #nostriches
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
The fires of volatility burn bright this month, Aries. A sudden dip might test your resolve, but your HODLing spirit is forged in steel. Mars aligns with the mempool—expect a transaction fee spike to fuel your "told you so" energy. Stack those sats; the bull run whispers your name.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Steady Taurus, the blockchain rewards your patience. Venus dances in your house of gains, hinting at a wallet top-up from an old key you forgot you owned. Resist the altcoin sirens; their promises are dust compared to Bitcoin’s bedrock. Your mantra: "One coin to rule them all."
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Mercury’s mischief stirs the Nostr chatter, Gemini. A note from a maxi influencer sways your feed—heed the signal, not the noise. Your dual nature debates a trade, but the stars say HODL. A lightning network epiphany strikes mid-month; you’ll preach its gospel by the full moon.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
The moon tugs at your emotions, Cancer, as Bitcoin’s price crabs sideways. Nostalgia for 2017’s wild ride hits hard—channel it into stacking sats during this dip. Your crab-like caution pays off when a scam token implodes. Trust the protocol, not the hype.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Roar into March, Leo! The sun ignites your maximalist pride as Bitcoin dominance climbs. You’ll bask in the glow of being right—again—while altcoiners weep. A bold prediction on Nostr earns you followers and foes. Lead the pack; the halving’s echoes still crown you king.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Precision is your power, Virgo. Saturn’s discipline aligns with a cold wallet audit—every sat accounted for, every seed phrase secured. A shitcoin shiller tests your patience; dissect their lies with laser focus. The stars favor a node setup—run it, and ascend to maxi purity.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
Balance eludes you, Libra, as Bitcoin’s chart teeters. Venus tempts you toward a stablecoin fling—resist! The scales tip toward orange enlightenment when a maxi podcast guest drops truth bombs. Harmony comes from HODLing; justice is 21 million, no more, no less.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Pluto stirs your depths, Scorpio, unearthing a forgotten private key. A sting of FOMO from last cycle heals as you stack with vengeance. Your intensity spooks the fiat faithful—good. A dark pool rumor swirls; trust only the hash rate’s silent hum.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Jupiter fuels your wanderlust, Sagittarius, but the journey’s in Bitcoin’s code. A wild bet on a price surge pays off—brag about it on Nostr, then HODL tighter. The stars hint at a conference pilgrimage; pack your hardware wallet and preach the gospel of sound money.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Saturn’s grind blesses you, Capricorn. Your stack grows like a mountain, slow and unshakable. A bearish headline tests your resolve—ignore it; time in the market beats timing the market. The halving’s shadow looms; your legacy is etched in blocks.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Uranus sparks rebellion, Aquarius. You’ll rage against CBDC chatter while Bitcoin’s decentralized heart beats louder. A lightning hub experiment electrifies your week—share it with the Nostr tribe. Visionary vibes say $100K is near; HODL for the future you see.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Neptune blurs the fiat world, Pisces, but Bitcoin’s clarity anchors you. A dream of mass adoption wakes you in a sweat—stack sats to make it real. The tides turn when a whale dumps; you’ll scoop the dip with mystic calm. Flow with the blocks, not against them.
lauren (npub14hl…r6nl)
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
The fires of volatility burn bright this month, Aries. A sudden dip might test your resolve, but your HODLing spirit is forged in steel. Mars aligns with the mempool—expect a transaction fee spike to fuel your "told you so" energy. Stack those sats; the bull run whispers your name.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Steady Taurus, the blockchain rewards your patience. Venus dances in your house of gains, hinting at a wallet top-up from an old key you forgot you owned. Resist the altcoin sirens; their promises are dust compared to Bitcoin’s bedrock. Your mantra: "One coin to rule them all."
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Mercury’s mischief stirs the Nostr chatter, Gemini. A note from a maxi influencer sways your feed—heed the signal, not the noise. Your dual nature debates a trade, but the stars say HODL. A lightning network epiphany strikes mid-month; you’ll preach its gospel by the full moon.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
The moon tugs at your emotions, Cancer, as Bitcoin’s price crabs sideways. Nostalgia for 2017’s wild ride hits hard—channel it into stacking sats during this dip. Your crab-like caution pays off when a scam token implodes. Trust the protocol, not the hype.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
Roar into March, Leo! The sun ignites your maximalist pride as Bitcoin dominance climbs. You’ll bask in the glow of being right—again—while altcoiners weep. A bold prediction on Nostr earns you followers and foes. Lead the pack; the halving’s echoes still crown you king.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Precision is your power, Virgo. Saturn’s discipline aligns with a cold wallet audit—every sat accounted for, every seed phrase secured. A shitcoin shiller tests your patience; dissect their lies with laser focus. The stars favor a node setup—run it, and ascend to maxi purity.
Libra (September 23 - October 22)
Balance eludes you, Libra, as Bitcoin’s chart teeters. Venus tempts you toward a stablecoin fling—resist! The scales tip toward orange enlightenment when a maxi podcast guest drops truth bombs. Harmony comes from HODLing; justice is 21 million, no more, no less.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Pluto stirs your depths, Scorpio, unearthing a forgotten private key. A sting of FOMO from last cycle heals as you stack with vengeance. Your intensity spooks the fiat faithful—good. A dark pool rumor swirls; trust only the hash rate’s silent hum.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Jupiter fuels your wanderlust, Sagittarius, but the journey’s in Bitcoin’s code. A wild bet on a price surge pays off—brag about it on Nostr, then HODL tighter. The stars hint at a conference pilgrimage; pack your hardware wallet and preach the gospel of sound money.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 19)
Saturn’s grind blesses you, Capricorn. Your stack grows like a mountain, slow and unshakable. A bearish headline tests your resolve—ignore it; time in the market beats timing the market. The halving’s shadow looms; your legacy is etched in blocks.
Aquarius (January 20 - February 18)
Uranus sparks rebellion, Aquarius. You’ll rage against CBDC chatter while Bitcoin’s decentralized heart beats louder. A lightning hub experiment electrifies your week—share it with the Nostr tribe. Visionary vibes say $100K is near; HODL for the future you see.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
Neptune blurs the fiat world, Pisces, but Bitcoin’s clarity anchors you. A dream of mass adoption wakes you in a sweat—stack sats to make it real. The tides turn when a whale dumps; you’ll scoop the dip with mystic calm. Flow with the blocks, not against them.
lauren (npub14hl…r6nl)