G. Paul Randall on Nostr: The days were like flies buzzing. Aimless, present, an endurance. I was out, and in. ...

The days were like flies buzzing. Aimless, present, an endurance. I was out, and in. The hallucinations were constant and so convincing that I mistook them for actual reality. There was nothing in them that my bodily senses or reasoning mind could suss out as inauthentic. I was in the world, reliant upon the world. My thoughts were flames consuming everything in all directions. Everywhere, shedding spark and licking at the edges of every extent. There was no direction it would not burn, this flaming mind. It followed the wind and lifted the skirts of the horizon, launching itself into the heart of the galaxy. But it preceded the wind, somehow. It became the wind when wind was needed. It burned into the wind’s mouth and sounded the four cardinal directions with its howls. I long to burn up everything, a fire so complete that even the smoke and ash would fold back in on it and become fuel again until it all was reduced to a naught.

Firebrand, 2024 (exerpt, unfinished draft) #writing