Not my name on Nostr: Coming back to “civilization” after weeks/months surrounded by the natural world ...

Coming back to “civilization” after weeks/months surrounded by the natural world (or at least as close to it as one can get anymore), the familiar sense of guilt and alienation I feel around other humans returns almost immediately.

I wish I had better words to describe the contrast between the natural world (and the peace and joy it brings) and this seeming catastrophe of human experience that so many of you call “life”.

I don’t care to convince anyone that I am “right” or that someone else is “wrong”. That is not the point of writing this.

It’s just that anytime I’m around others now, I struggle to bear the guilt of having a life (almost) worth living, while so many of you dither about with your oh-so-alien-to-me priorities.

I wish I could convince you all of a better way. But that is not my job. I don’t owe any of you anything. I am not your parent and besides, what works for me may be completely terrible for you.

The obvious answer is for me to return from whence I came and to leave you all alone to dither (or maybe thrive?) once more.

With this note written, I now take my own advice.

Good luck everyone. None of us deserves to suffer.