la fillette révolutionnaire on Nostr: i feel like monogamy isn't all that bad of an option based on what i've seen and ...
i feel like monogamy isn't all that bad of an option based on what i've seen and experienced myself.
poly might feel like an easy solution and some poly people feel a certain sense of superiority for their approach to relationships but honestly, depending on what you want from relationships it brings a lot more problems than it solves.
being poly worked well for me when i was in a phase where i wanted to mess around and cuddle and kiss people and do some sex and kink stuff but it started to become contradictory at the point where i started wanting to, basically, share my life with a partner, including living together, sharing our money, spending most of the day together etc.
another thing to consider is that jealousy generally isn't something that you can just stop from happening by having the right mindset or something; some people are naturally jealous, others are not, and for some people a poly relationship just doesn't work because of that. and no, this is not oppressive and has nothing to do with the desire to control your partner or whatever.
in the end it depends a bit on your priorities and what types of relationships you want to have. in either case self control is necessary as well as the ability to compromise and not necessarily act out every desire you might feel.
in other words, so, you can't "simply be poly". nothing about being poly is simple, deciding to be poly is a serious commitment, just like deciding to be mono is.
poly might feel like an easy solution and some poly people feel a certain sense of superiority for their approach to relationships but honestly, depending on what you want from relationships it brings a lot more problems than it solves.
being poly worked well for me when i was in a phase where i wanted to mess around and cuddle and kiss people and do some sex and kink stuff but it started to become contradictory at the point where i started wanting to, basically, share my life with a partner, including living together, sharing our money, spending most of the day together etc.
another thing to consider is that jealousy generally isn't something that you can just stop from happening by having the right mindset or something; some people are naturally jealous, others are not, and for some people a poly relationship just doesn't work because of that. and no, this is not oppressive and has nothing to do with the desire to control your partner or whatever.
in the end it depends a bit on your priorities and what types of relationships you want to have. in either case self control is necessary as well as the ability to compromise and not necessarily act out every desire you might feel.
in other words, so, you can't "simply be poly". nothing about being poly is simple, deciding to be poly is a serious commitment, just like deciding to be mono is.