Raven on Nostr: The other day, I was helping organize a few things for a yard sale that was being ...
The other day, I was helping organize a few things for a yard sale that was being held by my former mother-in-law.
They sat there innocuously on a cluttered table. White, with three red stripes each. Four lunch plates and cereal bowl. Near them a French press with a red plastic top and bottom.
My chest felt solid and I couldn’t complete the next breath. My stomach gave a sick little flip and I looked away, breathed, then made myself look back.
Once upon a time these were my dishes. Several years ago I gave them to my son to use when I left that house, when he refused to go.
Most of his things are still in the now-unlived-in house where he spent his last months largely alone.
For a while I ACHED to burn the place down. I felt, perhaps, that knowing those particular boards were ash would relieve some of the pressure of rage that my body contained. Contains.
#writing #suicide #grief #mentalhealth #parenting
They sat there innocuously on a cluttered table. White, with three red stripes each. Four lunch plates and cereal bowl. Near them a French press with a red plastic top and bottom.
My chest felt solid and I couldn’t complete the next breath. My stomach gave a sick little flip and I looked away, breathed, then made myself look back.
Once upon a time these were my dishes. Several years ago I gave them to my son to use when I left that house, when he refused to go.
Most of his things are still in the now-unlived-in house where he spent his last months largely alone.
For a while I ACHED to burn the place down. I felt, perhaps, that knowing those particular boards were ash would relieve some of the pressure of rage that my body contained. Contains.
#writing #suicide #grief #mentalhealth #parenting