rhtunstall on Nostr: We missed out on seeing family in #BC this summer due to #covid, #ableism and ...
We missed out on seeing family in #BC this summer due to #covid, #ableism and #exclusion.
Just days after arriving from England they all came down with covid, cancelling our imminent trip up north to see them.
The caravan then came to town a week later, led by my #ableist sister and #RightWing father fresh off #paxlovid.
My #immunocompromised wife and I were asked how we felt about spending two entire days at the PNE. My sister already knew we were opposed, this query was simply to demonstrate to visiting family how difficult we were due to our covid concerns.
We again respectfully declined, explaining this excursion was well beyond our daily risk level. We suggested a covid safe meetup outside the fair instead.
The group of 8, who had shared covid just ten days prior, then told us that this “would be difficult”.
It was explained by my sister that “unfortunately they only had 1.5 days” to spend at a crowded, wildfire smoke filled fair for what she called “A once in a lifetime experience for the kids”.
In response, she offered us a mere hour long breakfast at 8am on Sunday morning before they all returned to the fair for another 12 hours without masks.
I turned down this awkward meetup as we would have ended up driving longer than we would have seen them, and I was quite upset at being treated like we were being difficult simply because we wanted a family only visit outdoors in an unmitigated pandemic.
I suggested lunch, dinner or evening drinks on a porch; we would meet them anywhere in the city. I received no further response.
Family members I hadn’t seen in over five years chose to exclude and ignore us for their 2 days in the city due to our “paranoid” covid conscious mentality.
They came and left. No apologies or acknowledgement of what had happened, just silence and exclusion. We both felt beyond insulted and angry.
Weeks later (days ago) the phone rings. It’s my ableist right wing father who has only called me twice this whole pandemic.
He insinuates that it was disrespectful and selfish for us to miss their city visit, he’s let down that we didn’t join them at a pricey two day event with thousands of screaming strangers.
I am told that I can make it up to them by going out to the airport tomorrow morning at 8am to “spend a couple hours and see them off”.
I point out that the only reason we missed seeing everyone is because THEY all refused to put aside a moment for a covid safe visit with us.
I then explain that sitting on a covid skytrain tube for an hour to briefly meet family at an busy international airport terminal for a 2 hour long visit is once again, a risk that far exceeds my comfort level.
Dad scoffs, laughs at me and hands off the phone. “They never do anything anymore, a bunch of lazy disrespectful idiots.”
So ultimately, we the #vulnerable, not wanting to take unwarranted risks became the issue, rather than the ever-present virus itself.
All but two of the eight (including the kids who have had covid multiple times now) contracted covid on their extended vacation from reality.
My wife and I are still covid free but this time it came at a real cost. Anger, sadness, exclusion and disrespect.
We are now the black sheep of the family. Deemed selfish for not sacrificing our selves. This is our new #covid19bc reality. Alienated, discriminated against, sacrificed and forgotten.
Can’t help but think how all this could’ve been avoided if my family had selflessly worn #masks and taken preventative measures to ensure a safe visit rather than doubling down on lies spun by #BonnieHenry and this soulless #BCndp govt.
#bcpoli #cdnpoli #COVIDisNotOver #CovidIsNotMild
Just days after arriving from England they all came down with covid, cancelling our imminent trip up north to see them.
The caravan then came to town a week later, led by my #ableist sister and #RightWing father fresh off #paxlovid.
My #immunocompromised wife and I were asked how we felt about spending two entire days at the PNE. My sister already knew we were opposed, this query was simply to demonstrate to visiting family how difficult we were due to our covid concerns.
We again respectfully declined, explaining this excursion was well beyond our daily risk level. We suggested a covid safe meetup outside the fair instead.
The group of 8, who had shared covid just ten days prior, then told us that this “would be difficult”.
It was explained by my sister that “unfortunately they only had 1.5 days” to spend at a crowded, wildfire smoke filled fair for what she called “A once in a lifetime experience for the kids”.
In response, she offered us a mere hour long breakfast at 8am on Sunday morning before they all returned to the fair for another 12 hours without masks.
I turned down this awkward meetup as we would have ended up driving longer than we would have seen them, and I was quite upset at being treated like we were being difficult simply because we wanted a family only visit outdoors in an unmitigated pandemic.
I suggested lunch, dinner or evening drinks on a porch; we would meet them anywhere in the city. I received no further response.
Family members I hadn’t seen in over five years chose to exclude and ignore us for their 2 days in the city due to our “paranoid” covid conscious mentality.
They came and left. No apologies or acknowledgement of what had happened, just silence and exclusion. We both felt beyond insulted and angry.
Weeks later (days ago) the phone rings. It’s my ableist right wing father who has only called me twice this whole pandemic.
He insinuates that it was disrespectful and selfish for us to miss their city visit, he’s let down that we didn’t join them at a pricey two day event with thousands of screaming strangers.
I am told that I can make it up to them by going out to the airport tomorrow morning at 8am to “spend a couple hours and see them off”.
I point out that the only reason we missed seeing everyone is because THEY all refused to put aside a moment for a covid safe visit with us.
I then explain that sitting on a covid skytrain tube for an hour to briefly meet family at an busy international airport terminal for a 2 hour long visit is once again, a risk that far exceeds my comfort level.
Dad scoffs, laughs at me and hands off the phone. “They never do anything anymore, a bunch of lazy disrespectful idiots.”
So ultimately, we the #vulnerable, not wanting to take unwarranted risks became the issue, rather than the ever-present virus itself.
All but two of the eight (including the kids who have had covid multiple times now) contracted covid on their extended vacation from reality.
My wife and I are still covid free but this time it came at a real cost. Anger, sadness, exclusion and disrespect.
We are now the black sheep of the family. Deemed selfish for not sacrificing our selves. This is our new #covid19bc reality. Alienated, discriminated against, sacrificed and forgotten.
Can’t help but think how all this could’ve been avoided if my family had selflessly worn #masks and taken preventative measures to ensure a safe visit rather than doubling down on lies spun by #BonnieHenry and this soulless #BCndp govt.
#bcpoli #cdnpoli #COVIDisNotOver #CovidIsNotMild